Typically we talk about feedback between a manager and a team member. However, feedback can and should be given in any direction (even among peers or with your manager) and basically the same principles apply as we will see below.
Whatever the direction, method is everything.
In principle, feedback should not be provided for the sole desire to complete the activity which, we all know, may not be the most pleasant way nor to do it nor to receive it.
At same time feedback needs to be meaningful so to really steer performance: if you want to see it as “what you get back from the conversation”, the return on what has been done must be provided in such a way that it is effective and enables real change in the person who receives it.
So what are the keys to make the feedback process work?
Are you motivated to analyse and discuss?
Check the motivations that drive you to evaluate: before giving feedback, remind yourself why you are doing it.
Just remember that you are giving feedback to improve the person’s situation or performance, not to humiliate or punish. Which doesn’t mean to be mild or find a compromise, means to be be hard without humiliating. You need not be harsh, critical or offensive. You will likely get a lot more out of people when your approach is positive and with a mindset focused on improvement. This is not to say that the feedback always has to be good, but it should be fair and balanced.
Late feedback is similar to no feedback at all
Timing is everything: more feedback you give near the event you are analysing, the better the result will be. Giving feedback doesn’t go through a surprise or rehashing outdated episodes, so the sooner you do it, the more the person receiving it will expect it.
It’s much easier to provide feedback on a short job that wasn’t done right than it is to do about a full year of failed hour jobs. The only exception is if the situation has highly emotional connotations: in this case, wait until everyone has calmed down before starting feedback. The recipient is more likely to hear what you are saying and you will avoid saying something in the heat of the moment that you will later regret.
Feedback is better if regular and continuous
When you drive a car you steer continuously during your travel, not only once. The same applies to feedback. The more you make it happen continuously the better it is, just like any other routine. So try to make it a regular appointment: feedback is a process that requires constant attention. When something needs to be said, say it. By doing this, people will continually adjust course and there will be fewer surprises. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a formal moment, it can also be a short meeting as long as it’s significant and, most of all, dedicated.
Come prepared
Feedback is everything but improvising. Prepare yourself and your observations: You don’t have to get the result of reading a script, but you need to be clear about what you are going to say because it will help you stay on topic and stick to the problems you want to address.
Avoid generic feedback
Tell the person exactly what needs to be improved. This ensures you stay on the facts and leaves less room for ambiguity. Avoid “tales” and stick to what you know firsthand: the ground quickly becomes shaky if what you say is based on the opinions of others.
A feedback session should address no more than two/three issues. No more than this, otherwise the risk is that the person feels attacked and demoralised or overwhelmed by information which will not be processed.
Try to highlight something positive
People, even the most negatives one, embed and deserve a bit of positivity. A good rule of thumb is to start with something positive. This helps put the person at ease. Then give your honest feedback avoiding to have it mitigated by “forced positives” feedbacks.
