A sandwich can sometime sort out a day, but not while giving feedback: you put a slice of praise at the top and bottom and put the feedback “stuffing” in the middle, possibly the “bad” part. It’s a technique for providing feedback that is popular among leaders and coaches, parents and teachers. And I’m sure it’s true among many of us too.
Is not effective, here’s why
But if we analyse the technique and its characteristics better, we understand that our feedback “sandwich” doesn’t taste as good as it seems nor is effective for our purposes.
Behind this there are many reasons:
A) Even the positive part is dispersed. The first problem is that while waiting for real feedback the positive aspects remain unheard. When people hear praise during a feedback conversation, they prepare themselves, waiting for the other side of the coin to arrive, and this opening compliment loses its positive value: it is perceived as not serious but made with the aim of softening the negative side. Remember that is very difficult that people come to a feedback review calm and relaxed: most likely they will expect something they don’t like and will raise their guard.
B) You lower the meaning of the negative part. Even if you avoid this risk and manage to be sincere with the positive aspects, they can detract from the negative aspects: when you start and end with positive feedback, it is all too easy for criticism to be forgotten.
How to do something different
While the sandwich can help the person providing the feedback, for sure will not help the receiver.
So how to do it?
- Give the meeting a specific purpose
People are very open to criticism when they believe that what they receive is intended to help them. - Is not a peer feedback but you can make it similar
Negative feedback can make people feel inferior and levelling the playing field, it’s much less threatening and especially if you make it appear as a bilateral development. - Is the person in the mood to appreciate feedback
Once people take ownership of the decision to receive feedback, they are less defensive during the conversation. - Don’t do a monologue
This is not a lesson. Make it bilateral, fluent and inclusive.
